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THE RELUCTANT GROOM

Posted on August 10, 2016 at 12:25 AM

THE RELUCTANT GROOM



For the last week or so, he had noticed that everything was different, and he didn’t know why. The normal texts throughout the day, and phone calls, had all but ceased. He knew this was not a conventional situation, and that was fine with him, but he still couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. Who put such a premium on being conventional, anyway?

He had met her six years prior, and they were in very different situations, but they had remained friends, liking each other’s Facebook posts, and little daily greetings. For some reason, though, they had recently decided to take that next step, and make a connection. That’s what everyone is looking for, too, aren’t they, that connection.

From that point, they had certainly jibed, starting with a cellphone chat. He couldn’t believe how much they shared in common, and how similar their views were. Everything was going smoothly until this week, and he didn’t know why. Morning greetings went unanswered, and she was always occupied with business, or too exhausted to talk. They were both busy professionals, and time was at a premium, but she had always made time until recently.

To compound matters, there was the death of a close family friend, and a 24 hours stomach bug. I guess when it rains, it pours. A small distance separated them, so it was sometimes a week or two between visits, but he could sure use her company right now, and she wasn’t available. Something was definitely the matter, and he didn’t know what.

This girl was definitely different. That is what made her so special. She appreciated his cooking, and his corny sense of humor, that only his mom and four year old kids found funny. She also had the ability to make him feel like he was the only other person in the room, and that his opinion, and his ideas mattered, and had credence. His other tries at love had been disastrous, and that was why he focused so hard on work and parenthood. Fill your life with the things your good at, and distract yourself from facing your emotions. In typical man fashion, he just sucked it up. She had awoken something in him, though, that hadn’t stirred in a long time. It was refreshing, and quite frightening, at the same time. He had started to feel alive again, and not like an emotionless zombie. Other women in his life had only worried about what he could offer, but she was interested in what kind of man he was. He had marketed himself as an honest, hardworking, single father, and she was interested in what he was selling. In his words, he characterized himself as a nerd in the body of a linebacker, and so far few people had corrected that analogy.

On his last visit with her, while cooking, she had accidentally uttered that she loved him. Instantly, he could tell that she wanted to take the words back. He took her in his arms, gave her a big bear hug, and reassured her comfortingly, telling that his hearing was not what it used to be, and that he wasn’t sure what she had said. He wanted to utter the same words right back, but the word had been used as a pointed weapon so many times against him that it was just too frightening. A simple little four letter word was backing down the man who prided himself on being so tough. He could tell, too, that she was struggling with her feelings, and seemed to be just as frightened as him.

The next morning, though, she awoke with a new countenance, and a peaceful attitude about him, and what seemed to be about life. How could someone be so beautiful right upon waking? Years of night shifts had not made him a morning person. She showered him with kisses, and he could tell her emotional walls had seemed to crumble like Jericho’s. Surreally, it seemed like the last couple of months had built up to this moment. They were finally to know each other in the biblical sense. He was excited, but a little nervous, and very out of practice. He was also on a time crunch, and sadly had to walk out of the door soon afterward, leaving her alone to wrestle with her emotions alone. She saw him off with a fresh cup of oatmeal and coffee, and off he went to live his other life as a father and a professional. He made sure to put a card in the mail expressing his gratitude to her for the beautiful thing they had shared, and expressing his emotions for her loving him, despite his many flaws.

Something had changed this week, though. There had barely been any phone calls, and they had not video chatted in at least a week. He recounted in his head what he had said or done. There was nothing that stood out that he had done differently. He was training a new employee at work, which put demands on his time, and school was starting back, so his daughter demanded more time.

Then came the friend’s death. It was like a punch to the gut that drains all the energy from your body. He knew he had to speak to her, and she finally agreed to chat with him. It was refreshing to see her face again. Her laugh was starting to return, along with her smile, and her reassuring way. He had intended to wait until they were together, in person, but he couldn’t wait any longer. Out came three little words, ‘I love you’. With that came a Pandora’s Box of other emotions which he was not quite ready to deal with, but a catharsis also came over him. This changed everything. He knew things would never be the same between them, but that seemed like a good thing.

 

Lesson learned

Tomorrow is not promised to us. Love is one of the most powerful words in the English Dictionary, and telling someone you love them can be one of the most frightening things you can do. What’s also frightening, though, is her living an eternity without ever knowing how you feel. If you love her, tell her. You will be glad you did.

If you are planning on getting hitched. Please consider us. We would love to plan your love storybook.

Guest Writer,


Hank Arnold

Fifth Avenue Event Services

Palm Beach ,Florida

Office :800-691-6207 ext. 700

Direct :561-704-8293

www.fifthavenueservices.com

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2 Comments

Reply Andrea
2:07 PM on August 9, 2016 
[Cathy]
Thanks Hank for such a wonderful well written blog. My boyfriend and I went though a similar situation. I had an issue telling someone how much I loved them and may have let the love of my life go. This was an eye opener.
Cathy
I am happy this platform has made a difference in how you view love. I believe we must tell people whom we love, how much you love them due to the fact that life is a bit short.
Hank
Reply Cathy
2:01 PM on August 9, 2016 
Thanks Hank for such a wonderful well written blog. My boyfriend and I went though a similar situation. I had an issue telling someone how much I loved them and may have let the love of my life go. This was an eye opener.
Cathy